Blogger: Mary Keeley
Agents often remind writers to be patient during the journey to representation. But it doesn’t stop there. We continue to remind our clients on their journey to publication…or re-publication…as well. This isn’t only wise advice or a nice platitude intended to encourage. It’s a winning strategy.
Patience in relationships. A client let me know she was unhappy with me recently. I hadn’t responded to her email when I said I would, and she was feeling neglected. That cut deeply because responsiveness to clients is a high value to me. I felt awful that she felt unimportant. But I needed to be patient with her remarks because she didn’t understand that at the time she communicated, I was in the midst of 20 meetings with publishers at ICRS and then would be flying directly to a writers 
conference to teach two workshops. The pace was so fast, I didn’t enter a note on my calendar, and by the time I got back to the office, I had forgotten about responding. As much as any of us tries not to, we’re going to mess up once in a while. It’s part of being human. Thankfully, she responded in patience with me.
Writers who practice patience early in their writing life and choose to view delays, discouragements, rejections…and yes, oversights…through a positive lens are preparing themselves for successful relationships with future editors, marketing and sales staff, and publishing executives when your book is in production. It’s going to take patience on your part because undoubtedly you’ll have a disagreement here and there. Note any defensive reaction you might be having and surrender it to a spirit of patience while you give yourself time to think through the issue. Of course editors are human too, and occasionally they’re wrong. That’s when you bring your agent in to mediate. The good relationship you create with your publishing house will make them want to work with you again.
Patience with yourself. An author recently concluded that she needs to be patient with herself during the writing process. Each writer has areas that are easier for him or her than others. Plotting might come easily for other authors, but it was a stickler for her. Instead of getting frustrated and tempted to give up (never a productive atmosphere in which to do one’s best writing), she’s learned to factor time into her writing schedule for brainstorming ideas and then trying each one out until she finally creates the one that works seamlessly. This part of writing is going to require her most patient, gracious energy toward herself. She said patience “will help me not give up but continue to wade through, seeking out others who are natural plotters.”
Patience is all about the grace that preserves a positive, optimistic outlook toward our work and our interactions with others. That kind of attitude creates a teachable spirit that agents and editors look for, and it will preserve your relationships, your reputation, and love for your work. A winning strategy.
When was the last time you needed to exercise patience in your writing life? How did it go? Which part of the writing process is your biggest struggle?
I can’t end today without expressing a heartfelt remembrance of more than three thousand innocent Americans who lost their lives to terrorism thirteen years ago today. Let’s pause and pray for their families that still are hurting. On that horrible day, which will be remembered along with Pear Harbor forever, Americans rallied together spontaneously and turned to God. Let’s pray for America today too.
I’ll be on the road today and will have little time to respond to comments. But enjoy encouraging each other with your stories of how patience paid off for you in your writing life.
TWEETABLES:
Some things in publishing haven’t changed. Patience always is a winning strategy in your writing journey. Click to Tweet.
Patience is the foundation of a winning strategy in your writing life. Click to Tweet.
The topic of patience reminds me of 1 Corinthians 13. Of course, it is easy to say and harder to do. I pray that God will shine His patience through me when I start to lean toward the opposite.
Writing, in particular, calls us to be patient – patient to get the words just right, patient to complete the path to publication, patient to market and promote, and patient to begin the process again.
Ahhhhh, patience. I don’t know how many times I’ve had an encouraging encounter with an agent at a writing conference that ended up being just another “no thanks”. But I am glad for the agonizing time of waiting. Every time I submit a manuscript, it is better. Sometimes I read a book and think, this writer just needed to wait a little longer. I don’t want to disappoint readers, because I didn’t have the strength to wait just a little bit longer and get just a little bit better.
Not disappointing my readers! That has given me patience more than any other thing I can think of. I want to publish, yes, but when I read a mediocre book, I think “I don’t want to do this; I want to do better. If it takes longer, so be it.” Well said Kristen!
On my middle grade work … not sure what I’ll do with it … but I decided to go ahead and work on a proposal to have set aside. I’ve had the hardest time with a hook. My whole family began helping me last night … we were laughing ourselves silly … but we never could come up with the one line that was like … aha! I kept telling my husband to forget the word “desire.” Ha! I finally said, “Let’s go to bed. Maybe it will come to us through the night.” It didn’t really. But I’ll start the three page synopsis. I’m probably making it way harder than it has to be.
Blessings on this 9/11 … I’ll forever remember the courage one man had to rally others and declare, “Let’s roll.”
For a good 9/11 movie, look for “World Trade Center”.
Has the best line in any movie, any time…two survivors were found by a Marine, trapped deep in the wreckage.
They begged him not to leave them (someone had already found them, and then not returned…lost their position, apparently).
“We’re Marines, and we will not leave you. YOU are our mission.”
I can only imagine how dear those words would be if I were stuck in wreckage.
Oh, I just imagined it. I was stuck in wreckage … and Jesus said, “I will never leave you …. You are my mission.”
Thank you, Andrew.
I think of Jesus as the Sergeant-Major of the Corps, and God as the Commandant.
I haven’t seen that movie, Andrew. Glad you mentioned it!
I recently had cause to look up a line from John Dyrden –
“I am a little wounded, but am not slain; I will lay me down to bleed awhile. Then I’ll rise to fight again.”
The bleeding is literal. I have to be patient with internal bleeding, hypovolemic shock, and losing consciousness while writing.
Best-case, either I or my service dogs see it happening in time to get horizontal for awhile, and run a field-expedient saline IV if needed.
The dogs know where the IV supplies are, and will go and open the drawer. Then they’ll stay close and keep me warm and still.
It’s frustrating, because it does interrupt both the work flow and the attendant thoughts, but you’ve got to look at the funny side – I mean, dogs who know where the IV stuff is?
That’s hilarious, and if you can’t take a joke, well…
Point is not to elicit sympathy or, worse, pity (’cause I’m good to go, always). Point is that there are two sides to everything, and the frustration fades when you make the effort to see them.
Not to compare in any way, but think of Jesus, walking the Via Dolorosa. He knew pain, degradation, and the seeming ruin of His message. Must have been frustrating, eh?
“Behold, I make all things new.”
Frustration is the midwife to Resurrection.
In case anyone’s got a question, I do know how to run and maintain an IV, and it’s not for convenience.
No health insurance means a lot of improvisation.
And I don’t have to exercise “ER waiting room patience”, so HA!
I hope you can use the VA in Albuquerque. Several years back, we received excellent care there.
My first thought would be that you were ill and unable to send a message. I would send a thoughtful message to you, hoping that everything was all right.
I’ve published short stories in women’s magazines in the UK for about 15 years and I’ve noticed in the past 2 years that replies are taking approximately 3-6 months longer than usual.
Staff has been cut in most editorial departments and writers are just going to have to bite their nails for longer periods.
Patience in any way, shape or form has never come easy to me, but with publishing you must deal with it. The greatest struggle for patience in my writing life right now is allowing God to work through a situation with a ghostwriting project I completed. I must still my heart (and mind) and be open to hearing God’s direction.
Thank you for this lovely reminder about the importance of patience, Mary. Prayers for traveling mercies and continued prayers for America and all those who have suffered so greatly.
Patience in my writing life…..only every day. Raising young children ensures there’s no guarantee I’ll have the time to write. I can schedule it into my day, but kids have their own agendas, and . . . well. You know how that goes.
I’m not where I thought I’d be by now. But, I keep reminding myself I’m right where God wants me right now. When I get impatient about how long it’s taking me to finish a book or with some other aspect of the writing journey, I remind myself that I’m where I need to be right now.
Exactly, Jeanne.
I know this may sound trite, but I promise you, there will be a day when you’d toss your all writing dreams aside just to spend a day with that little boy, who isn’t so little anymore.
But then? That not-so-little boy will look at you like you’re crazy and say “Mom, seriously, we’re good. And I miss you too. But live the dream, Mom, LIVE it.”
Your boys are high octane and awesome, and you’re exactly where God wants you, because you bring order and peace to their world.
It doesn’t sound trite, my friend. These are wise words, and a good perspective from a person a few steps further along in the mommy-journey than I am. I appreciate your insight.
I know this may sound trite, but I promise you, there will be a day when you’d toss your all writing dreams aside just to spend a day with that little boy, who isn’t so little anymore.
But then? That not-so-little boy will look at you like you’re crazy and say “Mom, seriously, we’re good. And I miss you too. But live the dream, Mom, LIVE it.”
Your boys are high octane and awesome, and you’re exactly where God wants you, because you bring order and peace to their world.
You are an awesome Mom, and a great writer. Them’s the facts.
I do not know how that happened.
Jennifer, I know why your comment printed twice– because it’s worth repeating. I needed this reminder too.
Blessings ~ Wendy ❀
I needed this reminder, too. And that happened to me the other day … when commenting to Andrew. 🙂
Well said, Jeanne. I prayed for patience, and God made me a writer. 🙂
Mary, when people approach me about the writing life, the first thing I tell them is “Patience is a MUST.” For those who think they’ll sidestep that virtue, they’re in for a bit of a shock.
I trust my agent and her timing, and I realize she has her clients’ best interest at heart.I also understand she’s busy, working and negotiating on our behalf. (A GREAT thing!) If it’s a true emergency, I know I can always call or leave a voicemail. Other times, I might be more specific in my e-mail subject line if it’s something that needs immediate attention.
And I think all of us can identify with the need to be patient with ourselves. I know I can! It’s important to remember that when we struggle with those moments of doubt, those are the times God is preparing us for the ultimate victory!
I’m praying for you, dear Mary, and circling you with my cyber arms of positivity just now. What a HUGE blessing you are!
Go Team Mary! Rah! Rah! Rah! 🙂
***
And prayers today and always for our great nation!
Cynthia, it is definitely a blessing to have an agent who is busy. Then we get to celebrate the successes of our agent mates. 🙂
A friend gave me a little cat statue that says “Patience.” I keep it on a bookshelf in my living room, but maybe I should fetch it and put it front-and-center on my writing desk. LOL!
I try to keep multiple irons in the fire at all times, taking on copywriting, magazine articles, and other kinds of writing in addition to fiction. This juggling doesn’t build patience, but it distracts me from brooding about the fate of my novel. I become impatient if I think about it too much, so I try not to think about it.
I admire how you use your writing talents in different venues, Jenny.
I needed this today.
NEEDED this!!!
I am beyond frustrated right now and just growled AT my laptop.
Lord, fill me.
…and He did. 🙂
Patience. Ugh. I always laugh when people say to me: “You’re so patient.” In my experience, patience isn’t something a person comes by naturally. It’s a decision we make day after day, sometimes minute by minute. I think I’ve worked up my “patience” muscles by being a mom, and DEFINITELY by being a writer. But I still have those moments when I just want to shout to the heavens: “When?!?!?!” But I often feel like the reply is: “When it’s time.” So onward I plod, with Patience as my constant companion. Life is a journey. Even if I arrive at one milestone, I’ll need patience to reach the next. 🙂
So thankful for you, Mary! You’ve encouraged me many times, and your gentle spirit helps me to stay patient as we take each step on this journey.
Thank you for the reminder to keep 9/11 close today in prayers and thoughts.
Gabrielle, what a great reminder: patience is a choice. We must make the choice to practice patience time and again.
You + Mary=An awesome partnership! 🙂
This post and comments are like cool water on a hot summer day.
In taking a 50,000 foot view of my story, I found that I need to makes some things clearer in the beginning chapters regarding plot set up, motivation of my mc’s goal and so forth to help with the pace. It’s going well already! While I know this will take time, and push back my goals, I am a peace since I can see how much the story is strengthening. And the story comes first. Not my finishing goal.
Well, as we all know, “patience is a virtue” and that means it’s hard work that’s worth the time and effort in all areas of life.
I appreciate those who have been patient while teaching me the different aspects of this writing life. I appreciate the patience Wendy Lawton showed to me at a conference as we were conversing about the ins and outs of this calling.
I appreciate God’s patience as He continues to work on and in me.
So, yes, patience in all areas is worthwhile. Besides, what’s the alternative? No thanks, I’ll choose to work on patience. Thanks Mary, for the reminder.
I’m not surprised Wendy Lawton extended patience and kindness to you, Susan. She is a gem.
When my son was a toddler, I made a needlework hanging of a little boy kneeling at the side of his bed in prayer, captioned: Please be patient…God isn’t finished with me yet!
I agree with you, Susan. I also appreciate God’s patience as He continues to lead me along this writing journey.
When I get frustrated or impatient with my progress, I try to remember that it is a journey…and I’m grateful to those who have stopped to help me navigate the roadblocks.
“I’m not the writer I should be, but thank goodness I’m not the writer I used to be!”
As we remember 9/11, may our nation’s leaders turn to God and seek His guidance.
Kathy, I appreciate your quote about not being the writer you used to be.
Progress, even at a snail’s pace, is evidence that we haven’t given up.
I agree, Jenni!
After some reflection, I tweaked the quote a bit:
“I’m not yet the writer I aspire to be, but thank goodness I’m not the writer I used to be!”
I’m convinced that unrealistic expectations breed impatience. They can also suck the life out of you, and leave your fingers limp over the keys.
There’s a time to walk away from the story for rest and perspective. But there’s also a time to stab Resistance with the sharp point of determination.
Umm, Jenni, have you been ready my emails to Mary, because WHOA!!! You are spot on, sister!!!
I know what book you’ve been reading!
Which book??
Yep, Lori. The War of Art it is.
“Patience is passion tamed.”
Lyman Abbott
yawn.
Thanks for this reminder right before ACFW. At conference it’s far too easy to compare yourself and your writing journey to someone else’s and get frustrated. Last year, right before we entered the hall for the gala, Maureen Lang turned to me and asked how the conference had gone for me. We chit-chatted a bit, then she said–what do you hear God saying to you? That really got me. I paused and replied, I hear Him saying “just relax into this thing, Anne.” I’m taking that message with me again this year. Comparison is a joy killer. No one else can walk my journey but me. I want to relax into it with God.